My Big Boy Pants

This past year, I've tried to make a very conscious effort to grow up, ever since I "turned 22". In my pursuit to understand what it means to be 'adult', intellectual maturity, emotional maturity, spiritual maturity, and general lifestyle maturity have all been serious thoughts I've wrestled with. Part of that process is writing about it here on my blog. How mature am I now? Have I matured over the past year? How can I become more mature? Am I mature enough for my age? Am I too mature?

So am I mature? Psh. Probably not. I'm a long shot away, but I do want to be.

It's a heavy topic, and I do realise my last few posts have been rather dense and hefty. As much as the concept of maturity is a substantial part of my thoughts nowadays, perhaps I'll leave the topic(s) to be discussed another time. Instead, I want to present to you a rather more curious (and light-hearted) oddity I've noticed about myself.

As I had written about earlier, I come off as rather childlike. You could read this if you want to know why, or I could save myself from proving it by just showing you a picture of my current bedsheets:

When the ladies get on THIS bed, you can be damn
sure it's... Adventure Time. Bam.

Anyway, as easy as it is to point out those aspects of me, I've noticed I have also picked up a few traits that don't seem too familiar or in line. So here are the top ten signs I've put on my big boy pants:

1. Not only do I receive wines instead of chocolates as gifts during celebrations, I openly welcome and prefer the alcoholic option. I'm also watching my waistline, mind you.
   
2. In my mental cookbook of things I know how to cook, I have more than instant noodles and fried eggs available to me. I can now also scramble eggs.
   
3. I hate Monday mornings because they are Monday mornings, and not because they are just any morning.
   
4. When a friend suggests that we go to a "club", I genuinely and wholeheartedly hope they mean a book club as opposed to a nightclub.
   
5. I have four levels of waking up: when my alarm goes off and I am no longer asleep, when I actually open my eyes, when I finish my morning shower, and when I have my first coffee.
   
6. I have a "first coffee".
   
7. I spent way too much time adjusting my office chair because I am deeply concerned about sitting posture and the future wellbeing of my lower spine.
   
8. I count my days off like Scrooge McDuck counts his money, except I have the opposite of an abundance.
   
9. I used to envision the bachelor life as lots of partying, being free of consequences, and picking up lots of chicks (with the help of a trusty wingman, of course). My bachelor life now consists of hosting dinner parties and playing board games, thinking about how many kids I want, and owning two pet rabbits. I regret none of these.
   
   

   

   "What do you mean I'M your date for the evening?!"

   
   
10. I realise it's okay to consciously try and make an effort to grow up, but there's also no need to rush anything. 

Whilst I still constantly challenge and question myself whether I'm doing the right thing to evolve into whatever an 'adult' is (this isn't even my final form), noticing that I've unknowingly picked up these subtleties over time has taught me that sometimes, you can't choose or force yourself to grow up - it just happens to you. 

Perhaps all my thinking has made myself convinced that mental metamorphosis is something I can keep progressing by simply building upon piece by piece, when really a lot of it is out of my hands. There's only so much 'figuring out' I can do on my own in my head, until it comes down to just becoming 'mature'. And there will inevitably be a time for that, whenever it may be - exactly like the way I have picked up these seemingly big boy habits.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get to bed now. It's getting late; it's just past 10 pm. Plus, this rigid chair is doing my lower back no favours.